Nov
01

Black Cats and Fun Facts

As I write this blog post, it is the day of Halloween. October 31, 2012. Rather than try to say something about black cats and Halloween that is original, I decided to look out on the vast land that is the Internet and see what I could find. So here goes. First a little something about Theo (as usual); then I will hand over the keyboards to some other knowledgeable cat lovers.

Of all the types of cats that are adopted, black cats are adopted in fewer numbers than any other kind of cat. This means that more of them do get euthanized. So recently, animal shelters have been holding special adoption days for black cats, and even for black and white cats. Apparently the stories that black cats are only adopted in order to be tortured during Halloween are mostly urban myths. However, that doesn’t mean you should let YOUR black cat roam free on Halloween night. Far from it! So I brought Halloween in the house to Theo. This “BOO!” bag had been sitting out by our mailbox for over a week. Clearly it has been the recipient of some VERRRRRY interesting smells. Theo was compelled to examine it from all angles, smelling it suspiciously the entire time.

Theo the Cat smelling a Halloween "Boo" bag brought in from outside

Hmmm… what’s this? Smells like other cats I think! It’s been outside and someone has marked it with HIS smell. I don’t like this one little bit. Sniffffff…. sniffff….. Hmph! I do not find this amusing in the least.

From the Petsafe.net blog, by Roslyn Ayers in Knoxville, TN: 13 Reasons to Love Black Cats. http://www.petsafe.net/blog/2012/10/26/13-reasons-to-love-black-cats/ I particularly like these items:

8.  Black cats are like mini panthers. The Bombay is a lovable breed distinguished by its sleek black coat and gorgeous golden eyes. Their nickname is the “parlor panther,” because of their resemblance to the big cat.

9.  Black goes with everything. Place a black cat on your lap and notice the slimming effect. No matter your décor or color preference, black is the perfect complementary color, much like a black cat’s personality can be the perfect match to yours.

10.  Black fur won’t show up on black clothes, so whether you’re wearing comfy black sweatpants or a little black dress, you won’t have to worry about those little black hairs giving you away as a cat lover.

If you have a black cat like I do, and you have trouble getting good photos of him or her, this photographer has all kinds of good tips on her website. Her name is Devon Cattell (perfect last name for a cat lover, no?) http://www.cattell.net/devon/BlackCats/bc.html

She points out that black cat faces are very hard to photograph well and provides lots of helpful information that I will definitely keep in mind the next time I try to take pics of Theo.

For more fun and informative facts about black cats, check out this article from Jennifer Copleyhttp://suite101.com/article/black-cat-facts-a360011Here are just a few facts: A Japanese superstition holds that a black spot on a cat indicates that the soul of a dead ancestor dwells within it. Other superstitions involving black cats have included the belief that a black cat meeting up with a funeral procession augurs another death in the family, and that finding a single white hair on a black cat will bring good fortune.

Until next time, remember that black cats are beautiful (or handsome!), smart, engaging, fun and need good homes even more than tabbies do!

 

Oct
25

Theo and the Magic Cabinet of Heaven

Okay, the cabinet is not really magic. And it doesn’t really contain Heaven. But Theo sure thinks it does. Theo is what animal trainers call “very food-motivated” which is a nice way of saying he’s a greedy fur pig when it comes to treats. Because of his inherited urinary tract issues, he’s on a special diet of wet food only and it’s tightly controlled. Half a can in the morning, half in the evening. No dry food. Maybe because of this, he loooooooves those crunchy treats. And he’s not picky. Pounce, Greenies, whatever kind of little crunchies you’ve got, he’ll take ’em.

Now, I like to say that I have trained Theo to do what Dave Letterman calls “Stupid Pet Tricks.” Michael contends that it’s really the other way around: Theo has trained ME to do “Stupid Human Tricks.” Well, you say tomay-to and I say tomah-to, whatever. But he really is extremely smart (for a cat, as has been also pointed out). Theo has a table where he can look out the window next to my kitchen chair. He loves to sit there while we eat, or even when we’re not. He also likes to watch me eat (big surprise) and stretch out his paw (piteously no doubt) to try to grab whatever I am eating.

Theo the cat alert on the table, looking at you

Got any more of those crunchy treats? Huh? Huh? Got any more? You didn’t give me nearly enough just now, you know.

So now, he’s gotten used to us at the table at lunch time. Not every day, sometimes we have meetings and so on, but frequently enough for this to be a ritual. We both have a cup of yogurt for dessert. As soon as Theo hears the scraping sound of the spoon in the bottom of the empty cup, he’s on the floor in Advanced Cuteness Mode. Rolling over, paws on his chest, purring loudly– he throws it all out there. Then if that doesn’t work, he sits between us and stares back and forth at the Magic Cabinet of Heaven, which is above the stove (one of the few places I know he can’t reach). Sure enough one of his well-trained humans will get up and get the bag o’ treats. At which point Theo’s Siamese genes take over and he becomes very, very vocal.

So now he will jump up on the window table, stand on his hind legs and stretch all the way up to get three little treats that I tuck between my knuckles. He grabs my hand very delicately to balance. And, if you throw a treat to the other end of the kitchen, he will leap off the table and race to get it, then come racing back. Sometimes he skids on the kitchen floor and fishtails all over the place before he gets the treat. I have to confess, we laugh so hard when he does that, he really should be embarrassed. But when it comes to treats he has no dignity whatsoever.

I honestly think sometimes he’s part dog.

Oct
18

You say “Vacation”– I say “Abandonment.”

Well, it’s happened again. Almost as soon as I wrote my thoughts about “weekends'”– and only mentioned “vacation” in passing, my humans up and leave me. And this time, for a whole week. That’s a really, really long time in Cat hours and days. OK, they did leave a pretty nice friend of theirs to “take care” of me, and he did fairly well. That is, fairly well considering he’s not MY human, doesn’t know me as well as Linda and Michael do, AND he was gone a lot. I mean, a lot. He works more than one job or something. Linda is here a lot when she is working and Michael is here quite a bit too, so they always pay attention to me when they see me napping or when I demand it by rolling around on the floor or whatever. Plus they know exactly where to scratch me and pet me and they give me treats almost every day, which this human most certainly did NOT.

Theo the cat in our luggage, trying to keep us from packing

I try to tell my humans not to leave by sitting in their bags so they can’t pack, but they just don’t seem to get the message!

I’ll tell you, any Cat would be bored to death with nothing to do and nobody to play with all day. BUT the worst part is when the humans start to get ready to go on “vacation.” You can always tell! They go into their closets and dark places and pull out all kinds of stuff you hardly ever see. Big empty bags and cases (although those are fun to sit in and hide in); big coolers for food, backpacks, binoculars, books, cameras, and on and on and on. I try to tell them not to go away by sitting on top of these objects as often as possible, so they can’t put things into them. But they have no respect, or they are just not smart enough to get what I am trying to say. (I suspect the latter.) They just move me out of the way, and the closer they get to when they actually have to leave, the more crazy they act. By the time they are leaving, usually in the morning, they are actually yelling at each other because they are so stressed out. I ask you, is this a good way to go have fun and relax? I don’t think so. But then, when they come back (after days and days and days), they are always in a much better mood. And, they feel sooooo guilty about leaving me behind that I get extra treats and attention for the first few days after they return.

I have to admit I am really happy to see them when they first come home. Still, I usually will nip them or scratch them a little (just a little!) or ignore them for a while, so they know they’ve displeased me. It doesn’t seem to stick with them though. I know they’ll go away again at the first chance they get. Oh well, at least I don’t have to go in the Car to the Horrible Vet. I do get to stay here in my own home with my own toys, bed and food. So it could be worse. But, for a Cat,  you know… it could also always be BETTER.

Theo sitting on the bed and ignoring us

To show my displeasure at my imminent abandonment, I turn my back on Linda and Michael and refuse to say goodbye. Sometimes I use the silent treatment when they come back too, just so they feel more guilty.

Until next time, and I hope your humans don’t ever abandon any of you, my Feline Friends.

Theo

Oct
11

Art with Cattitude: The Creative Process

Like a lot of creative people, I often get asked how I come up with ideas. Well, in my case, sometimes it’s in the car. Sometimes in the shower. Sometimes when I am doing something else entirely. In my corporate career (http://designthatworks.com and http://www.designthatsgreen.com) my creativity is more “on demand” – that is, I usually have deadlines, we’ve been paid in advance, and there may already be a meeting on the calendar to present ideas and concepts we haven’t even thought of yet.

Art with Cattitude is different. It’s more spontaneous. Sometimes Theo does something and I say, “I have to write that down before I forget!” Sometimes a friend sends me a picture of their cat, or someone submits something to the Cattitude Art Contest. It might be something I saw online that sparks an idea. In any case, if I don’t grab something to write or draw with immediately I might forget entirely. (It’s not like this is the only thing I do with my time, unfortunately!)

So I thought some of you might be interested in seeing a bit of how the Art with Cattitude illustrations get done.

First I sketch the art out lightly in pencil. Sometimes I work directly with ink, but usually it’s light pencil. Occasionally the first sketch doesn’t work, so it’s start over again in pencil (or ink).  If I started with pencil, then I do the ink on top of that. Then erase the pencil. Then, using colored pencils (Prismacolor, one of my favorite media), I color the artwork. This takes a while, depending upon how complex the composition is.

I usually have the idea for the caption and the art almost simultaneously. But not always. Sometimes the caption I think of first doesn’t work and I have to re-write it (maybe even more than once). If that’s the case, then when I get to the scanning process, I have to replace the original caption with the new one and retouch it. Since I work on textured off-white paper and use a flatbed scanner, that can be a bit of a hassle. The backgrounds rarely match from one scan to the next, but after you’ve done a bunch of these you get the hang of it and can do it more quickly.

Cat saying, Come rub my belly, I promise I won't bite your hand...really!

For this illustration I started with a rough sketch of Theo in ink (left). He lies on the floor with his paws like this a lot, sometimes with one eye on me and the other closed. Then, I made a more finished version of the art (middle), and tried out two different captions: “Who you callin’ a slut?!” (at the top of the second illustration – we call this cat pose the Slut Pose); and ” Sure I know I’m cute. Can’t you see I’m workin’ it?” Neither of these seemed to work, so I thought of another one and just sketched it in roughly in ink with a very rough outline of the artwork for positioning (right). Then, I scanned in both the final caption and the final art and merged them in Photoshop.

The sketches here are from one of the very first pieces of Art with Cattitude I did. This devious guy is on note cards and on the labels for our note card boxes. He’s based on some sketches I did of Theo, but I changed his fur color and face (I can’t have ALL the Cattitude artwork looking like Theo – as much as he would like that!). If you notice, I actually tried two different captions before settling on the final one. That’s because, as any cat person knows, a cat will frequently lure you in with his adorable furry belly and then, once he’s finished with your affection, will grab your hand in his paws and bite the ##@**$$# out of it.Cat_rolled_over_begging_for_belly_rub

And here you see the final version. Piece of cake, right? Well, not always. But it’s never boring, because I love cats and drawing cats and channeling what our cats would say if they could speak our language!

 

 

Oct
04

It’s waaaaayyyy past my breakfast time. Does anyone care?!!?

Theo the Magnificent here again. I suddenly realized that in my recent post, I had neglected to cover all the days of the week when I addressed feeding times, and how to get your humans to feed you when YOU want to be fed. That is, I had forgotten the two days of the week which for humans seem very different from the other five days.

In my house, and most likely in yours, the humans get up early five days a week. Most of the time it’s still dark, and clearly not time for normal Cats to get up, but there you are. Then, a lot of the time, once it’s light and they’ve done all kinds of other tasks, including the most important ones (feeding me, cleaning my litter box), they leave. And they don’t always come back until it’s dark again. OK, you get used to this pretty quickly. It’s normal and you get fed at a reasonable time in the morning and then again at night. It’s a little boring but you can always find things to do, including sleeping of course.

But then there come these other two days. And they happen over and over again. My humans don’t get up until it’s light. Then they just lie in the bed and drink their disgusting black hot stuff and yap at each other. Sometimes for a loooonnnnggg time. Meanwhile, I am starving. Yes! Starving! I sit there in the doorway and stare them down. Sometimes this works, sometimes not. Sometimes they go under the covers and make bizarre sounds with each other, at which point I am forced to leave. I am not a voyeur, no matter what any Cat says.

These days are difficult. I have been trying to train them for quite some time now, but sometimes I despair that they will ever get it. One “weekend” (I think that’s what they call it), they will comply. The next weekend, not so much. Not only do they not feed me on schedule in the mornings, but sometimes they feed me too late at night as well. And the worst part is, sometimes they go away for five whole days or more, which makes all that time feel like a “weekend” – but with none of the affection or fun or anything. They don’t even come home at night. They call this a “vacation” and talk about “getting away from everything” – but do they ever take me? NOOOoooo. Not only that, they leave some other humans here to “take care” of me, and let me tell you, they could do better. Not all these substitute humans perform their job to my standards. Of course they are better than the alternative – I hear some Cats have to go in the dreaded Car and stay for days in a cage at the Horrible Vet when their humans are gone. I shudder at the very thought.

Anyway, if any of you out there in Catworld would like to provide tips on the “weekend” issue, please do. I do my best to give advice, but even I am sometimes baffled by the inconsistent behavior of humans.

I look forward to more feedback from my furry friends.

Theo

Sep
27

A Rare Thank-You from Theo (Alert the Media!)

I had intended to post my additional comments today about getting fed on “weekends” – as humans call them, because those two days of the week seem to be so different from the other five days. But instead, I overheard my human talking about some “charity” she supports, which takes in Cats (as well as dogs, but hey, nobody’s perfect) that no human wants. And they keep these Cats (and dogs) until someone will give them a forever home. My humans were talking about this week being something called “Adopt A Less Adoptable Pet Week” and they said lots of black Cats (like me except I am really not totally black) and black dogs, plus older animals and animals with health problems, don’t get adopted because of a lot of reasons. None of the reasons they mentioned seem like good reasons to me. Doesn’t every animal deserve a good home and loving humans?

Here is a picture of another Cat who looks a little bit like me. His name is Tug and he is at the “no-kill shelter” my humans like, Furkids. He deserves a loving home as nice as mine, don’t you think?

According to my female human, an animal that does not get into a “no-kill shelter” could end up, well – I can hardly type these words – dead. This is, of course, horrible to contemplate. But then I started thinking. It’s been a long time since I came to live with my two humans, who call each other “Linda” and “Michael” and a bunch of other nicknames too embarrassing to publish. But when I thought back, I did realize that my humans took me in to live with them just like this no-kill shelter they talk about. I was in pretty bad shape, I have to confess. I was really hungry, because I had been tossed out of my original humans’ house at some point and left to “take care of myself.” But I was not much more than a Kitten!

When I saw my two humans walking in their neighborhood that fateful day, something just  told me to follow them. They didn’t want me to, but I did it anyway. And they did take me in and feed me and I got some much-needed sleep. (It’s scary and exhausting being a small Kitten out on your own with no idea where your food or shelter is coming from.) However, that was not the end of it. They talked and talked about finding my “real” owners, and they put up signs, and all kinds of stuff. They even had some awful strangers come to the house to look at me to see if they would take me instead.

Well, I could have told them stories about my previous humans but it would probably just upset my poor humans even more than they were already. The important thing is, eventually they came to their senses and decided to keep me. I really don’t think they had much choice in the matter, but they seem to think so. I’ve been here a good long time now and I have to say, it beats the heck out of the alternative. My humans are really good to me, for the most part. They feed me well and give me treats, and they know exactly the right places to stroke, rub and scratch. They’ve even made up some songs just for me. Those songs really make me purr.

So just in case I haven’t said it already to Linda and Michael: THANK YOU. Thank you for taking me in, for loving me, feeding me, and giving me a wonderful forever home. I love you guys. There. I said it. Don’t get cocky, I probably won’t ever say it again.

Signing off now. I feel a powerful urge to wash my face.

Theo

Sep
20

Feeding Time: How to Control Your Humans and Therefore, Control Feeding Time

One of the most burning Cat questions has always been, “How can I get my humans to feed me when I want to be fed, how much I want to be fed, and what I want to be fed?” (That’s actually three questions, but we can address at least one of them in today’s column.)

Let’s take the easiest one first, how to get fed when YOU want to be fed, and we will consider this the first installment of three: 

This is actually fairly easy, at least for morning feedings. There are many methods; some work better than others and some work better on some humans than on others. You will simply have to experiment until you find the combination of tactics that work best on your personal human(s).

  1. Morning feedings: Depending upon how early you want to be fed, you may choose any or all of the following. Be careful in combining them too early or you may not be able to figure out which one by itself is most effective.
    1. Getting up on the bed next to your human and purring very loudly;
    2. On the bed, sitting on the head of your human;
    3. On the bed, pawing your human’s face (careful about the use of claws as this may result in a sudden flight through the air and an undignified landing);
    4. Meowing piteously and loudly from anywhere in the bedroom;
    5. Meowing from a hall or other nearby room, so that when the human gets up to make you be quiet you can lead the way to your (empty) food bowl;
    6. Scratching something the human finds valuable or important (the fabric-covered headboard; the carpet; the book lying on the floor; the roll of toilet paper; there are many possibilities);
    7. Throwing up a hairball. (This is a last resort but you can always just hack and cough as IF you were going to hawk one up. This almost always results in the human waking up but does not guarantee feeding, since if you DO throw up they will assume you have an upset stomach and may actually DELAY your breakfast);
    8. My personal favorite, given my high level of dignity and my half-Siamese heritage, is to stare relentlessly at my humans from the bedroom door until they feel their faces beginning to sizzle from my blue-green glare. This almost always wakes up my personal humans but is not guaranteed to work for you.
Cat_hearing_can_opener

Sitting at your human’s feet and acting adorable whenever you hear a can opener frequently gets you whatever was in the can. Great if it was tuna; not so much if it was tomato sauce.

  1. Evening feedings: A lot of the tactics listed in Item 1 also apply, except for the fact that presumably your humans won’t be in bed asleep. Here are some others.
    1. Lying down on the floor in the kitchen while your humans are making dinner, eating dinner and/or cleaning up is great, particularly if you refuse to move and they have to step over or around you;
    2. Standing up on your hind legs with your front paws on the cabinets and meowing piteously;
    3. Staring at them while they eat;
    4. Scratching something near and dear to them if they have ignored all of the above and are now watching TV or something else unacceptable instead of feeding YOU.
  1. Treats, handouts, table tidbits: This is simply a matter of repetition and consists of doing whatever your humans consider “adorable, cute and precious” until you wear them down; at that point they will be at your mercy forever.

As always, additional tips on how to train your humans are welcome. Until the next time, may you always get the food you want, when you want it.

Theo

Sep
13

Why Everything in the House Belongs to Us

It is constantly amazing to me, and I assume to the rest of you in CatWorld, that my humans consider all of the items in their home to be “their” possessions. Obviously, nothing could be further from the truth. Everything in the house is clearly ours. Unless we just don’t want it, in which case we ignore it.

My humans think it’s “so cute and adorable” when I rub up against the furniture, or against them, or anything. We all know that’s just another way of marking our possessions, but OK, whatever.

The trouble arises when humans feel as if we are trespassing on “their” items or even damaging “their” possessions. This can get particularly unpleasant if the items are furniture, clothing or shoes. Especially shoes, in the case of female humans, who seem pathologically attached to “their” shoes.

What to do in the case of humans trying to “train” (ha!) you not to sit on, scratch, chew, or otherwise damage “their” stuff:

  1. Look as penitent as you can manage at the moment of being scolded.
  2. Do this ONLY if they have caught you in the act. If the damage has become apparent later, you are free to act as if you have no idea what they are talking about.
  3. Once they are satisfied that they have gotten their point across, they will usually leave the room or at least turn away. Wait a few minutes and then, if the act that got you in “trouble” was getting up on a piece of furniture, feel free to get right back up there. After all, it IS yours.
  4. Scratching and chewing can be a bit more challenging. You may really enjoy chewing a particular shoe; however this may result in it being removed from your access altogether. If this happens, accept it and move on. There are always other things to chew.
  5. Disciplining your humans can be a tiring and taxing task. Do not let it get you down. Remember, scratching your furniture, climbing your drapes, and chewing your shoes or other items can be an excellent way to remind your humans that you are hungry, or thirsty, or want to play, or any number of other rewarding activities. Most humans will catch on to this pretty quickly, but it is advisable to not overdo it. If you use this as a disciplinary tactic, use it sparingly. Otherwise the humans may simply get to the point where they decide not to care about “their” stuff anymore and just let you shred or chew it to pieces, and you will have lost your strategic advantage.
  6. Eliminating waste outside your litter box. This is a last resort, and I do not recommend it except in cases of dire emergency OR if your human has been extremely negligent in cleaning it, and you are teaching him/her a lesson. If you decide to take this step, remember it may backfire. It is essential that the human see you do this, so that it is imprinted on his or her feeble little brain that he/she has somehow transgressed and offended you deeply. A truly devoted human will clean your box immediately and will apologize profusely, and maybe even give you treats. BUT! Misuse this tactic, or over-use it, and you may find yourself in the dreaded Car, going somewhere from whence you may never return.

I hope you have all found this column helpful. As always, your comments are welcome. Until the next time, good grooming and sleek fur to all.

Theo

 

Sep
06

Basic Cat/Human Etiquette

It should not surprise any of you in CatWorld that there are some basic rules of etiquette governing how we interact with our human slaves (or servants or whatever you prefer to call them). However, it’s probably not very surprising that the humans don’t always seem to know these rules.

So, as my first piece of advice to all you fabulous felines, I offer the Basic Rules of Cat/Human Interaction:

  1. The Cat is always right.
  2. The Cat is always in the right spot at the right time. The human should not attempt to dislodge, yell at or discipline the Cat. If the Cat desires to go out, the Cat shall go out. The same applies to coming back in.
  3. The Cat’s dignity is irreproachable. No human shall ever laugh at a Cat. Ever. No matter what that Cat has recently done, or attempted to do, that has seemed humorous to the human.
  4. The human should understand his or her incredible good fortune at being the chosen companion of the Cat, and should appreciate this fact daily as well as show his/her appreciation in the form of good food, comfy places to sleep, excellent toys and just the right amount of attention.
  5. The human should not pet or otherwise interfere with the Cat’s current activities unless the Cat indicates this is a good idea.
  6. It is always clear, at least to the Cat, when this is NOT a good idea.
Theo the cat sleeping

All Cats should have plenty of comfy places to sleep. At the top is a picture of my current afternoon nap spot. Also, it should always be clear when the Cat wants attention. The “paws-over-the-face” trick is a guaranteed human-pleaser.

 In exchange, the Cat shall: 

  1. Agree to be talked to in terms that would be considered beneath a Cat’s notice unless the human talking is the Cat’s personal human or humans. Close personal friends of the human who speak to the Cat in this manner may or may not be tolerated on a case-by-case basis.
  2. Chase and kill small creatures within the house, including spiders, crickets, cockroaches and other vermin, and eat them as desired. This makes female humans very happy and frequently results in treats.
  3. Exercise good judgment as to the killing and presentation of other, larger creatures, particularly those from outside. The demise (and also potential dismemberment) of some of these creatures may not elicit the praise the Cat would quite naturally expect.
  4. Behave in such a manner as to elicit praise and petting from the humans the Cat lives with. This can include but is not limited to: playing with toys, rolling around on the floor with paws waving, stalking imaginary objects and just generally being what the humans call “cute, adorable and precious.” Again, this shall be on a case-by-case basis and is certainly not performed “on demand” for the human’s other family members, friends or significant others.
  5. Make clear at all times that the Cat chooses to live here. This may take the form of occasionally ignoring the human when he or she calls us, but shall not be performed so frequently as to upset the human, or in their words, “piss them off.”
  6. Show our affection to the human(s) when appropriate, with loud purring, leg-rubbing, head-butting, stretch-greeting, tail elevation and other physical activities calculated to further endear us to them.

Clearly, all Cats know these Rules. It is up to us to make them clear to humans, and to enforce the Rules. Only then will the humans behave appropriately.

Good luck with your human training programs. I look forward to hearing from my feline friends with additional tips and tricks for training humans.

Theo

 

Aug
30

Introducing Theo Live and in the Fur

Hello, I am Theo the Magnificent, Panther Boy of Death. (It really should be Panther MAN of Death, though, don’t you think? Or maybe just Panther of Death… after all, a Panther is infinitely superior to a human, don’t you agree?)

It’s about time my human let me speak up for myself. I thought she would never shut up. I mean, I like her a lot and everything, especially when she scratches me exactly right and gives me those amazing crunchy things to eat, but really. It’s as if she thinks she’s the boss around here. Well, we all know that’s just not true, don’t we?

All in all, I have a pretty decent life. The two human slaves who live here with me are pretty good to me. They won’t let me go out and kill stuff, which used to bother me a lot more when I was younger. Now, I just like to sit and watch all the delicious flying feathery things and scampering furry things outside and think big thoughts about catching them. Someday.

I do have to give my humans major props for recognizing my true worth when they first met me, though. OK, it took them awhile to truly appreciate my magnificence. In fact, it took longer than it should have. But they got there eventually. (I don’t care what anycat says, they ARE trainable. Just slow.)

So, I am going to use this space in the future to answer pressing questions any of you other cats out there might have. Such as:

– How do I get my slaves to feed me when I want them to, not when THEY want to?

– And, why do they keep telling me to get down off the tables when they know that high places are my natural habitat?

– Or, how do I get them to get up at the proper time in the morning (that is, the proper time for me)?

Watch this space. I am full of lots of great advice and ideas and will be very happy to share all of it with all of you fellow felines out there in CatWorld.

Good hunting and many purrs to you,

Theo

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